How is it that those who want kids to be independent thinkers get offended when those kids think differently, or act in ways they prefer they not? Assuming we're not talking about sin or something ungodly...
Showing posts with label COMMUNITY. Show all posts
Showing posts with label COMMUNITY. Show all posts
Comfortable People
You know how you can be around someone and almost immediately, you can tell the comfort level is one of those that is unique? It isn't stressful to be around them and the conversation flows readily...
In the past I would be very excited about such times to where I'd think that a super close friendship was possibly on the horizon. This was when I craved close relationships and sought them out--prayed for them even.
But now I see it as a sweet opportunity from the Lord to just enjoy such company, and hopefully be a blessing. A part of me is changed forever when it comes to relationships since my friend committed suicide. It isn't merely that she took her own life, it is something that started in my life before I even knew her. It's a topic I recently read about in When People Are Big and God is Small regarding how we aren't created with the need for people in a psychological way, but rather we have physical and spiritual needs that should be what drives our actions. God meets our needs as we focus upward and outward, but the more we feed our personal 'needs', the more we focus inward. Focusing inward is not a focus on the Lord.
There are days and times where a person touches something in our hearts, or where through interactions with them God harkens a part of our hearts that has a little wound. This week as we come to my friend's birthday, I find myself thinking about her. I'm not missing her in the same way I have been, but rather am just thinking about her and the loss we've all dealt with. Sometimes it is too much to ponder why she did what she did, and it can be hard to keep thinking 'if she just hadn't...'.
So this is a thank you to the young bride I was blessed to share breakfast with at my house. She'll never see this post, but she was used to bless me today and awaken fond memories of God's faithfulness through our talking.
In the past I would be very excited about such times to where I'd think that a super close friendship was possibly on the horizon. This was when I craved close relationships and sought them out--prayed for them even.
But now I see it as a sweet opportunity from the Lord to just enjoy such company, and hopefully be a blessing. A part of me is changed forever when it comes to relationships since my friend committed suicide. It isn't merely that she took her own life, it is something that started in my life before I even knew her. It's a topic I recently read about in When People Are Big and God is Small regarding how we aren't created with the need for people in a psychological way, but rather we have physical and spiritual needs that should be what drives our actions. God meets our needs as we focus upward and outward, but the more we feed our personal 'needs', the more we focus inward. Focusing inward is not a focus on the Lord.
There are days and times where a person touches something in our hearts, or where through interactions with them God harkens a part of our hearts that has a little wound. This week as we come to my friend's birthday, I find myself thinking about her. I'm not missing her in the same way I have been, but rather am just thinking about her and the loss we've all dealt with. Sometimes it is too much to ponder why she did what she did, and it can be hard to keep thinking 'if she just hadn't...'.
So this is a thank you to the young bride I was blessed to share breakfast with at my house. She'll never see this post, but she was used to bless me today and awaken fond memories of God's faithfulness through our talking.
Kids and Respect
This won't be exhaustive, but I wanted to share about raising kids to be respectful and some areas that it matters. I've noticed that young adults who were allowed to second-guess or sass their parents are rather difficult beings to interact with. They don't have a natural respect for those who are older, they have more of a 'if you earn it, I'll respect you' attitude. This kind of negative thinking is easy to form in children, especially if they are only raised by a mother. Women don't notice disrespect as quickly as men do, in general. Subtle tones, ways of questioning...these nuances can be lost on the gentler sex, particularly if she is preoccupied. Men see problems in young men fast, they understand them and too often we ladies want to be more gentle or talk things out more...boys respond well to action that reveals they have been caught in their sinful attitudes. When young children are permitted to question their parents in a disrespectful way, or comment disrespectfully on things their parents do, it lays a foundation for attitude problems later. I think daughters are more apt to this sort of disrespect..."Mom you really spent a LOT at the store!" or just second-guessing what Mom does or how she runs the house. If this type of behavior is allowed to fester, look out later on.
When I was growing up, the relationship between kids and adults was so different. No one was chums with their parents or their friend's parents. We respected them and they acted like adults, not kids. It was the same between kids and their aunts and uncles. I recall my Aunt correcting me just like she would her own child, and that sort of thing was welcomed. In today's world, it's more likely when a kids gets in trouble, the parent is siding with the child and not the adult (think: teachers, relatives, neighbors). It is a sad state of affairs that in today's "NOTICE ME!" world, adults are so insecure that friendship and approval are sought from kids rather than being bold and taking a stand on "I am not concerned if you like me, but I'll hold the line." I think a lot of us can read that and think, "No way, I'm not worried about my kids liking me." but if we really think about all that we reveal to them as far as who we are, we might find that isn't entirely true.
Did you know your parents, I mean, really know them? Did they share all manner of opinions and such with you, their child? I think in general there is a much more immature parenting community among us, myself included, when compared to how our parents were. We can protect our kids from mature content in books or movies, but are we displaying and sharing 'adult themes' in our conversation that undo that? I don't mean x-rated, I mean the thought patterns that an adult evaluates situations with.
It can be hard to find the balance between trying to raise adults and allowing the innocence of childhood, and I'm not able to give a formula. I just think it's worth thinking about if you have young kids at home: how is what I say impacting them? Kids are so sensitive to our opinions and they feel much more secure if we seem to love and like everyone they interact with.
When I was growing up, the relationship between kids and adults was so different. No one was chums with their parents or their friend's parents. We respected them and they acted like adults, not kids. It was the same between kids and their aunts and uncles. I recall my Aunt correcting me just like she would her own child, and that sort of thing was welcomed. In today's world, it's more likely when a kids gets in trouble, the parent is siding with the child and not the adult (think: teachers, relatives, neighbors). It is a sad state of affairs that in today's "NOTICE ME!" world, adults are so insecure that friendship and approval are sought from kids rather than being bold and taking a stand on "I am not concerned if you like me, but I'll hold the line." I think a lot of us can read that and think, "No way, I'm not worried about my kids liking me." but if we really think about all that we reveal to them as far as who we are, we might find that isn't entirely true.
Did you know your parents, I mean, really know them? Did they share all manner of opinions and such with you, their child? I think in general there is a much more immature parenting community among us, myself included, when compared to how our parents were. We can protect our kids from mature content in books or movies, but are we displaying and sharing 'adult themes' in our conversation that undo that? I don't mean x-rated, I mean the thought patterns that an adult evaluates situations with.
It can be hard to find the balance between trying to raise adults and allowing the innocence of childhood, and I'm not able to give a formula. I just think it's worth thinking about if you have young kids at home: how is what I say impacting them? Kids are so sensitive to our opinions and they feel much more secure if we seem to love and like everyone they interact with.
Bonhoeffer
To say I'm presently enamored with Bonhoeffer, by Eric Metaxas, is a mild overstatement. Mild. My girlfriend sent me her copy to borrow. She is currently working through Studies in the Sermon on the Mount, which I continue to go through as well; there is such satisfaction in reading the same books as close friends and then discussing them.
What is amazing me are how ideas I've been having and grappling with are being said plain in Bonhoeffer. In observing American dormitory life, " Community is therefore founded less on truth than on the spirit of 'fairness'." (this is because they, meaning Americans and those involved with the church and theology, do not see 'the radical claim of truth on the shaping of their lives~Bonhoeffer)
Oh how this sums up the dissatisfaction of community for the sake of community. To have communion with others who study the Word and ponder it's truth...who seek to live set apart from the wicked modern culture rather than compromise...to have discussions about the intricate theology that historic Christianity was built upon! There indwells deep fellowship.
Of course, I am not a theologian and do not comprehend nearly as well all that I hope to by the end of my days. But striving toward understanding what it means to be a disciple, striving to understand God...communing with others doing the same, is beyond words.
What is amazing me are how ideas I've been having and grappling with are being said plain in Bonhoeffer. In observing American dormitory life, " Community is therefore founded less on truth than on the spirit of 'fairness'." (this is because they, meaning Americans and those involved with the church and theology, do not see 'the radical claim of truth on the shaping of their lives~Bonhoeffer)
Oh how this sums up the dissatisfaction of community for the sake of community. To have communion with others who study the Word and ponder it's truth...who seek to live set apart from the wicked modern culture rather than compromise...to have discussions about the intricate theology that historic Christianity was built upon! There indwells deep fellowship.
Of course, I am not a theologian and do not comprehend nearly as well all that I hope to by the end of my days. But striving toward understanding what it means to be a disciple, striving to understand God...communing with others doing the same, is beyond words.
Social Services--Like the Devil, in Nevada
http://www.lifenews.com/2012/10/31/court-may-force-mentally-disabled-nevada-woman-to-have-abortion/
You would think a story of a mentally impaired person's pregnancy, potentially ending in forced abortion, would happen anywhere but the United States of America. Read this story to see the facts surrounding yet another measure of pure incompetence.
Come, Lord Jesus, come.
You would think a story of a mentally impaired person's pregnancy, potentially ending in forced abortion, would happen anywhere but the United States of America. Read this story to see the facts surrounding yet another measure of pure incompetence.
Come, Lord Jesus, come.
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