There is a transition that needs to happen in the life of parents if they are to truly help disciple their children in godliness. It is the transition that moves a parent from thinking their child's perspective is right, to seeing when they are being manipulated as parents and when the child has an incorrect way of thinking about something.
I recall having a child who always loved their teachers; fault was hard to find in any of them! Then another child who always complained about their teachers and would have, what seemed to be, solid examples of why there were problems.
In time we realized both children had perspective issues. Thinking rightly requires parental guidance.
Confronting someone does not equate meanness. This is a truth that requires maturity on both the part of the parent and the child.
The Bible speaks of lovingly turning one's brother from sin as truly loving them. This involves a gentle confrontation. When there are rules that are broken, the standard should be upheld. Should the offender be able to continue in their sin to the detriment of all others? The Bible talks about individuals and individual accountability because we deal singularly with God as people. Enter through the narrow gate---one by one. When a brother is sinning, we carefully help them see their error just as we (should) hope they help us. When swift action to remedy one's errors can be taken, but isn't, it reveals the heart attitude.
As a body of believers, we do not honor God by ignoring His statutes. Adults are to be in proper authority over children, and when we instead empower children, we will not get His results. We will continue to foster wrong thinking and thus, a wrong way of interacting with those in authority over us. Instead of having true reconciliation, stress will be present in the child who is allowed to essentially, lie.
The world has influenced the church and believers in more ways than this, unfortunately. We will reap what we sow collectively and individually.
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