Projecting Our Sin onto Others

Have you ever been treated in a manner that really does not reflect who you are or how you have acted? This can be tough to determine since a believer knows how wicked their own heart can be, yet, there are times when we know how someone is acting toward us is really more of a reflection of their own struggles and not our own. 

But a natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned. 1 Cor 2:14

If you homeschool, perhaps people were unkind and unsupportive when you announced your plans to take responsibility for your children's education. Was this a reflection of people's beliefs in your ability, their lack of understanding about home education, or was it more an indicator of what they thought they could or couldn't manage themselves? We can't know another person's heart, but thinking in this way can help us give grace when we are being treated unjustly. Do what God has called you to do and let the results speak for themselves. It might take 20 years, but the fruit of a person's life doesn't lie. Sometimes even fellow believers do not see the need to keep kids out of the wicked public schools; leave it to the Lord. People carry different burdens and hurts, and pride isn't something believers are immune to. Let the Lord do the fighting. 

17Brothers and sisters, join in following my example, and observe those who walk according to the pattern you have in us. 18For many walk, of whom I often told you, and now tell you even as I weep, that they are the enemies of the cross of Christ, 19whose end is destruction, whose god is their [k]appetite, and whose glory is in their shame, who have their minds on earthly things. 20For our [l]citizenship is in heaven, from which we also eagerly wait for a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ; 21who will transform the body of our lowly condition into conformity with [m]His glorious body, by the exertion of the power that He has even to subject all things to Himself. Phil 3:17-21

Another scenario--someone isn't honest with you about their own life and situation. You know in your heart you would be ready to show understanding and grace, yet the person just won't be forthright, likely because of their pride. What can you do, especially if you suspect the person is justifying their actions by wrongly accusing you of not being understanding? As a Christian, it is generally a wise idea to show love and grace as we're able and afforded opportunities and leaving the rest to God. Those not in Christ feel they have to put on a good front and give people an image of who they want to be; they often will not show vulnerability if they can't come out looking like the better person. A Christian brother or sister may not be spiritually mature in this area, so patience and grace, and perhaps a gentle word of correction are actions to consider. 

For the desire of the flesh is against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, in order to keep you from doing whatever you want. Gal 5:17

Being a Christian means we will be misunderstood, falsely accused, and treated unequally from how we treat others. The lost will not repent toward us, they will not admit wrongly attributing qualities to us which they actually possess. It is part of the spiritual battle being waged around us. Satan wants to separate, have hurt feelings and people who are 'right' at whatever expense. Let people be wrong and love them through it. Let people fail to acknowledge their unfair expectations of you and love them anyway. We will never convince people of what they are incapable of seeing, and the lost cannot see with spiritual eyes because they are spiritually dead. The natural man is a man who can only see in the human dimension, he cannot see or understand the things of God. 

For those who are in accord with the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who are in accord with the Spirit, the things of the Spirit. Romans 8:5