Things Change

I've always loved the yard...gardening, grass tending, flowers, playing with my dog or just sitting out there listening, praying, thinking... Many fond memories from when my beloved children were young and lived at home full time fill my mind whenever I'm out there. 

In recent years I've had to forgo gardening, which has been a big change. The work I do now precludes hobbies that have me low to the ground, bending my knees unnecessarily. I never imagined that would happen, but it has. The sun is very hot now on my skin, something else I didn't foresee. The prolific strawberry patch has been covered over so that the weeds and plants do not return. It is hard on the back to deal with picking berries and weeding over and over! 

All this to say, the most notable change that I couldn't have imagined, is a rather profound sadness when I'm outside, spring beckoning, and walking the perimeter of the yard, talking with my dog. I say "with", but I guess it is more "to". She doesn't respond (thankfully, not yet, anyway.) Thoughts of my youngest invariably come mind, and it is hard that he is not here. We weren't outside all the time together, but the deep joy I had from the times out there together have left a deeper impression than I realized at the time of the making. He was often helping me do things; and working outside together brought me so much pleasure. He liked being outside, too, and was generally happy to help. His strength made jobs very easy for me :). I guess it was just really nice to have someone to get to do things that were sort of getting more difficult, but which enabled the enjoyment to be there, and the companionship was nice. He was always a good listener and had things to say, too. The yard rather became my sons as he aged because part of manhood training gave the mowing and trimming there to him. Plus the dog and lots of her training was done by our son. We'd often talk of going fishing or just out to Colonial to drive around and see the sights. That was a place we enjoyed together, and the nicer weather brought it up in our conversations.  

It is just interesting when we love a place, and spend time in that place with someone who is happy to be there with us, how it creates something special. Maybe more than we realize. 

So maybe encourage your kids to be with you doing things you love. They will, possibly, learn to love those things with you. And special memories are made. While there is sadness later in those places, it is so much better than emptiness or just your own solitary memories. 

In closing, let me encourage the reader to be nice to your children. Love them enough to make the right choices. Love their dad, and enjoy the long days you have together. If you do things right, one day you will lament their leaving as they make their own way in the world, praying fervently for the Lord to watch over them, keep them safe, and guide their steps. Because the time comes that they have to go, and you will want them to, but it doesn't always make you feel happy. ♥