Homeschooling is wrought with aspects that bring forth a myriad of emotions. Crying, for mom and child, may happen on any given day depending on the year. Yelling, sadly, may happen along the same line. Frustration, elation, depression, confusion, disappointment, fear, trepidation, anxiety....the list is long and encompasses the full spectrum of human feelings.
Given all of this, and even the reality that one of my children cried DAILY during math for YEARS, the part of homeschooling that is the most difficult for me is looking at old materials that I loved or had high hopes for, but simply didn't get to, didn't take the time to go through WITH my student, or loved and have now moved on from.
Regret is the toughest thing for me. It doesn't seem to matter if my students are completely ready to move on to the next grade level, or if they've tested beautifully, or what anyone thinks of their intellect or maturity. The problem lies with me, their mom, who is seldom satisfied with my own performance in this life when I slow down and take a close look.
The anguish that fills me when I look at an old Bible study book we thought would be good but just never really turned out to be...was it because I never sat down and engaged my student but rather handed it over to be done independently? I remember that year and time. It was a busy time, like so many, and I just wanted to find something fresh and new that a friend was also using...we thought the kids could find some common ground to talk about.
Old writing programs are so easy to set aside when their time has come and gone, but OH!, the hours of working so hard to put pen to paper and all the lessons learned. How we enjoyed hearing those stories which sometimes began books they worked on for weeks or months in their spare time.
How do you say goodbye to the hardest, best years of your life? This is my continual pain. I think of what I would tell a friend sharing all of this heartache with me--the things I've not written but which lurk inside my head.
I would say, "You've done the best you could do. I know you--I see your sacrifice and effort. Sure it wasn't perfect, yes things were left undone, but you've kept your family number 1 and have sought the Lord. You love your kids and you demonstrate that as much as you can. Throw out those reminders of your failures or short-comings--put the past behind you and get organized and excited for a new year. These days are fleeting. Those easy and fun elementary years are quickly becoming a chapter for the annals, but don't waste this time looking back. Press on, dig in, be more engaged than ever and start a new page in your homeschooling journey. The kids aren't grown yet, no matter how much they look like you when you thought you were grown. They need you in different ways, but they still need you. Engage, listen, and never forget you are the parent and as much as you enjoy being with them, their job is to leave and have their own life. Nurture your close, actual friends who put in to you as you do them. Date your husband continually to keep perspective. God will keep giving you purpose and a life. Stop worrying about what is gone and what is going, and don't miss right now. You can do this homeschooling thing, again. Try to make it your best year yet."
God help us all who are preparing, planning, organizing and trying to be equipped for a year of pouring in to our kids so they can be the most effective Christians they can be.
Given all of this, and even the reality that one of my children cried DAILY during math for YEARS, the part of homeschooling that is the most difficult for me is looking at old materials that I loved or had high hopes for, but simply didn't get to, didn't take the time to go through WITH my student, or loved and have now moved on from.
Regret is the toughest thing for me. It doesn't seem to matter if my students are completely ready to move on to the next grade level, or if they've tested beautifully, or what anyone thinks of their intellect or maturity. The problem lies with me, their mom, who is seldom satisfied with my own performance in this life when I slow down and take a close look.
The anguish that fills me when I look at an old Bible study book we thought would be good but just never really turned out to be...was it because I never sat down and engaged my student but rather handed it over to be done independently? I remember that year and time. It was a busy time, like so many, and I just wanted to find something fresh and new that a friend was also using...we thought the kids could find some common ground to talk about.
Old writing programs are so easy to set aside when their time has come and gone, but OH!, the hours of working so hard to put pen to paper and all the lessons learned. How we enjoyed hearing those stories which sometimes began books they worked on for weeks or months in their spare time.
How do you say goodbye to the hardest, best years of your life? This is my continual pain. I think of what I would tell a friend sharing all of this heartache with me--the things I've not written but which lurk inside my head.
I would say, "You've done the best you could do. I know you--I see your sacrifice and effort. Sure it wasn't perfect, yes things were left undone, but you've kept your family number 1 and have sought the Lord. You love your kids and you demonstrate that as much as you can. Throw out those reminders of your failures or short-comings--put the past behind you and get organized and excited for a new year. These days are fleeting. Those easy and fun elementary years are quickly becoming a chapter for the annals, but don't waste this time looking back. Press on, dig in, be more engaged than ever and start a new page in your homeschooling journey. The kids aren't grown yet, no matter how much they look like you when you thought you were grown. They need you in different ways, but they still need you. Engage, listen, and never forget you are the parent and as much as you enjoy being with them, their job is to leave and have their own life. Nurture your close, actual friends who put in to you as you do them. Date your husband continually to keep perspective. God will keep giving you purpose and a life. Stop worrying about what is gone and what is going, and don't miss right now. You can do this homeschooling thing, again. Try to make it your best year yet."
God help us all who are preparing, planning, organizing and trying to be equipped for a year of pouring in to our kids so they can be the most effective Christians they can be.
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