I don't know about you, but sometimes I can get in to thinking I am not doing enough for the Lord. I'll marvel at those He's called to a life of continual sacrifice or 'full time service', even though we're all called to full time service if we're Christians. Still, some people are called on continually by others and have to give, give, give.
Recently when thinking about this and after talking to my husband, whose heard it countless times along with my best girl friend, the Lord impressed something upon my mind. Maybe it will apply to you and help you, too.
It is a calling to be in a family of unsaved people as the only believer. The loneliness and heartache of loving many who are lost and disinterested in the truth is a pain only those of us living it can understand. It would be amazing to have parents or in-laws who are truly following Christ, but for some of us, we're alone. Perhaps you are the only believer in your whole family, meaning your spouse is not a follower of Christ. This, too, is a special calling not put upon us all. Some of us have been brought out of a childhood of ashes while others had a pretty smooth trip. God allows different things in this life for us to overcome.
Instead of feeling guilty about a wonderful marriage and peaceful home, perhaps we ought to give thanks to God and realize He HAS called us to hard work. Maybe what we see as super hard that others are dealing with is not that way for them. Maybe our own hardships are what others want no part of.
Whatever we do in word or deed, it should all be done for God's glory.
Hardest Part of Homeschooling
Homeschooling is wrought with aspects that bring forth a myriad of emotions. Crying, for mom and child, may happen on any given day depending on the year. Yelling, sadly, may happen along the same line. Frustration, elation, depression, confusion, disappointment, fear, trepidation, anxiety....the list is long and encompasses the full spectrum of human feelings.
Given all of this, and even the reality that one of my children cried DAILY during math for YEARS, the part of homeschooling that is the most difficult for me is looking at old materials that I loved or had high hopes for, but simply didn't get to, didn't take the time to go through WITH my student, or loved and have now moved on from.
Regret is the toughest thing for me. It doesn't seem to matter if my students are completely ready to move on to the next grade level, or if they've tested beautifully, or what anyone thinks of their intellect or maturity. The problem lies with me, their mom, who is seldom satisfied with my own performance in this life when I slow down and take a close look.
The anguish that fills me when I look at an old Bible study book we thought would be good but just never really turned out to be...was it because I never sat down and engaged my student but rather handed it over to be done independently? I remember that year and time. It was a busy time, like so many, and I just wanted to find something fresh and new that a friend was also using...we thought the kids could find some common ground to talk about.
Old writing programs are so easy to set aside when their time has come and gone, but OH!, the hours of working so hard to put pen to paper and all the lessons learned. How we enjoyed hearing those stories which sometimes began books they worked on for weeks or months in their spare time.
How do you say goodbye to the hardest, best years of your life? This is my continual pain. I think of what I would tell a friend sharing all of this heartache with me--the things I've not written but which lurk inside my head.
I would say, "You've done the best you could do. I know you--I see your sacrifice and effort. Sure it wasn't perfect, yes things were left undone, but you've kept your family number 1 and have sought the Lord. You love your kids and you demonstrate that as much as you can. Throw out those reminders of your failures or short-comings--put the past behind you and get organized and excited for a new year. These days are fleeting. Those easy and fun elementary years are quickly becoming a chapter for the annals, but don't waste this time looking back. Press on, dig in, be more engaged than ever and start a new page in your homeschooling journey. The kids aren't grown yet, no matter how much they look like you when you thought you were grown. They need you in different ways, but they still need you. Engage, listen, and never forget you are the parent and as much as you enjoy being with them, their job is to leave and have their own life. Nurture your close, actual friends who put in to you as you do them. Date your husband continually to keep perspective. God will keep giving you purpose and a life. Stop worrying about what is gone and what is going, and don't miss right now. You can do this homeschooling thing, again. Try to make it your best year yet."
God help us all who are preparing, planning, organizing and trying to be equipped for a year of pouring in to our kids so they can be the most effective Christians they can be.
Given all of this, and even the reality that one of my children cried DAILY during math for YEARS, the part of homeschooling that is the most difficult for me is looking at old materials that I loved or had high hopes for, but simply didn't get to, didn't take the time to go through WITH my student, or loved and have now moved on from.
Regret is the toughest thing for me. It doesn't seem to matter if my students are completely ready to move on to the next grade level, or if they've tested beautifully, or what anyone thinks of their intellect or maturity. The problem lies with me, their mom, who is seldom satisfied with my own performance in this life when I slow down and take a close look.
The anguish that fills me when I look at an old Bible study book we thought would be good but just never really turned out to be...was it because I never sat down and engaged my student but rather handed it over to be done independently? I remember that year and time. It was a busy time, like so many, and I just wanted to find something fresh and new that a friend was also using...we thought the kids could find some common ground to talk about.
Old writing programs are so easy to set aside when their time has come and gone, but OH!, the hours of working so hard to put pen to paper and all the lessons learned. How we enjoyed hearing those stories which sometimes began books they worked on for weeks or months in their spare time.
How do you say goodbye to the hardest, best years of your life? This is my continual pain. I think of what I would tell a friend sharing all of this heartache with me--the things I've not written but which lurk inside my head.
I would say, "You've done the best you could do. I know you--I see your sacrifice and effort. Sure it wasn't perfect, yes things were left undone, but you've kept your family number 1 and have sought the Lord. You love your kids and you demonstrate that as much as you can. Throw out those reminders of your failures or short-comings--put the past behind you and get organized and excited for a new year. These days are fleeting. Those easy and fun elementary years are quickly becoming a chapter for the annals, but don't waste this time looking back. Press on, dig in, be more engaged than ever and start a new page in your homeschooling journey. The kids aren't grown yet, no matter how much they look like you when you thought you were grown. They need you in different ways, but they still need you. Engage, listen, and never forget you are the parent and as much as you enjoy being with them, their job is to leave and have their own life. Nurture your close, actual friends who put in to you as you do them. Date your husband continually to keep perspective. God will keep giving you purpose and a life. Stop worrying about what is gone and what is going, and don't miss right now. You can do this homeschooling thing, again. Try to make it your best year yet."
God help us all who are preparing, planning, organizing and trying to be equipped for a year of pouring in to our kids so they can be the most effective Christians they can be.
The Reality of Homeschooling in Middle and High School
Homeschooling is hard work. It takes consistency, commitment, diligence and steadfastness to do it and do it well. As kids progress out of beginning math skills, math needs to be done 5 days/week. This means that taking one day a week off to do other things entirely is going to require summer school or weekend school. There is no way around this in my opinion and experience. Every parent I know that does a program which leaves just 4 days/week for academic work has a student/s who is not on track to graduate on time.
This means they are behind their public school counterparts in some respects. This means they have not been spending their time doing what is required for competency at the high school graduation level. Think about that.
We have to face the facts when it comes to the largest rocks to fit in to our daily/weekly/monthly/yearly jars of academic choices. There are things our students NEED to know--for daily living and for success in college and/or the work force. All work is not created equally and we have to cull what is nice or fun sometimes so that the real work that needs to be accomplished, IS accomplished.
I'm sad to say that few people I personally know and are homeschooling are really getting the job done. I see students years behind in math, or working on math from several years ago while trying to tackle this year's math. Parents put Bible ahead of core subject areas and shun planning as being less holy or spiritual. This is disastrous. Christians should be at the forefront of order and competency, and knowing the Bible, while critical, is really not even a category that should be a part of school. It is something that stands alone entirely.
I worry for young homeschooling families being influenced by these sweet, yet failing, homeschool mothers whose husbands have failed to lead their home effectively. We cannot expect homeschooling to be looked upon favorably if we support high schoolers who can't even get through Algebra 1 by 11th grade.
In sum, please keep in mind that school must morph as students get further in elementary school. No math curriculum for upper elementary and beyond can be fully done Sept-May at just 4 days/week if you are taking 3 weeks of holiday breaks during that time period. Perhaps you are happy to have your kids do school all summer, and perhaps you are OK with that, too, but realize the decision you are making and stick to the commitment required.
This means they are behind their public school counterparts in some respects. This means they have not been spending their time doing what is required for competency at the high school graduation level. Think about that.
We have to face the facts when it comes to the largest rocks to fit in to our daily/weekly/monthly/yearly jars of academic choices. There are things our students NEED to know--for daily living and for success in college and/or the work force. All work is not created equally and we have to cull what is nice or fun sometimes so that the real work that needs to be accomplished, IS accomplished.
I'm sad to say that few people I personally know and are homeschooling are really getting the job done. I see students years behind in math, or working on math from several years ago while trying to tackle this year's math. Parents put Bible ahead of core subject areas and shun planning as being less holy or spiritual. This is disastrous. Christians should be at the forefront of order and competency, and knowing the Bible, while critical, is really not even a category that should be a part of school. It is something that stands alone entirely.
I worry for young homeschooling families being influenced by these sweet, yet failing, homeschool mothers whose husbands have failed to lead their home effectively. We cannot expect homeschooling to be looked upon favorably if we support high schoolers who can't even get through Algebra 1 by 11th grade.
In sum, please keep in mind that school must morph as students get further in elementary school. No math curriculum for upper elementary and beyond can be fully done Sept-May at just 4 days/week if you are taking 3 weeks of holiday breaks during that time period. Perhaps you are happy to have your kids do school all summer, and perhaps you are OK with that, too, but realize the decision you are making and stick to the commitment required.
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